“You don’t understand, children are happiness, and how can I stop when they keep being born!”

A relative named Zinaida continues to ask for money from my mother and me. Every month, like clockwork, she calls us, pleading for financial help. I’m getting tired of this routine, as it has been going on for years.

Zinaida is my mother’s cousin, and for many years, she and her daughter Valya have persistently sought financial assistance from us. Every month, we receive a call with the familiar request: “Hello, dear parents, please help us financially, or we won’t have any funds at all. Let’s not die of hunger!”

It has become a recurring situation, and it’s not just us who are affected; other relatives who unwillingly sponsor Valya and her children also share the burden. Valya seems to believe that it’s acceptable to rely on family members, borrowing money and then conveniently forgetting the debt.

Despite numerous attempts to reason with Valya during family discussions, explaining that we can’t sponsor her indefinitely, as everyone has their own families and financial constraints, she remains deaf to our concerns.

Her response is often, “You don’t understand, children are happiness, and how can I stop when they keep coming?” It became apparent that discussing responsible family planning with her was futile.

To provide some background, many years ago, Valya married hastily and had a child. The father of the baby was an alcoholic, leading to the child’s health issues. Subsequently, fundraising campaigns started to support the family. This pattern repeated with each subsequent child Valya had, and over the years, she became a mother eight times.

A troubling aspect is that every child born to Valya has faced health challenges. Despite warnings from doctors, Valya refused to acknowledge the issues, continuing to have more children. Visiting her apartment is distressing, as it appears neglected and unclean.

Eventually, we learned that Valya could no longer conceive due to organ strain. However, the monthly requests for financial assistance did not cease because now the children needed ongoing care.

One day, a friend working in social services visited, revealing a shocking truth. Valya receives substantial sums from various insurance and benefit programs. It turned out that she had significant financial resources but audaciously continued demanding money from us.

This revelation left me in disbelief, questioning why Valya continued to seek assistance despite having access to substantial financial support.

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